Thoughts are pretty powerful. Positive thoughts can lift your mood, be a conduit of good energy for everyone you meet throughout the day, change the world, etc. Negative thoughts are said to be a precursor to disease, anger, fighting, depression… the list goes on. I’d like to be able to say that my thoughts are always positive, but I’m not a saint, an angel, or anywhere near enlightened. I get frustrated and can stew in my own juices just as well as the next person.
I’ve been working on a project that has me examining some pretty painful childhood memories. This week has been particularly intense, and I’ve found myself holding onto routine things that bring me comfort. A cup of tea in the evening before bed. A warm shower in the morning. A cat by my side when I’m writing, and yes, running.
I went out today hoping for a long run, anywhere from eight to ten miles. I wanted to get out of my head and hang out in the great outdoors. I wanted that nirvana feeling, that total endorphin rush, that feeling of being absolutely alive.
I didn’t quite achieve it. The loop I traveled was a new one for me, so I didn’t know the exact distance. It ended up being just shy of 7.5 miles. I wanted to break out of my usual loop and see something new. I ran along the road for a good four miles before being dumped onto a trail for about half a mile. From there, I turned onto a sidewalk and ran the rest of the route next to another busy street. There were little hills here and there, but the biggest detractor was the smell of exhaust and having to look over my shoulder at every block to cross the street. Maybe this is a good loop, but not on a weekday. A Sunday morning would be best for this one, before any cars are out.
I’m home again, freshly showered and in clean, dry clothes. I never got to that peaceful, happy place where my brain hangs out when I’m running sometimes, yet there’s a sense of stability that comes from performing an activity that inherently make me feel better in the long run. I may be frustrated or sad at times, but I’m not picking up a pack of cigarettes to soothe my nervous system. I’m not engaging in risky behaviors (other than running on the road) and even though I’m not especially HAPPY right now, running is a rock that anchors me to the here and now.
This is what I need to remember, so I will put it into words. Engage in behaviors that make you feel GOOD. When things get hard, when you’re depressed, frustrated, stressed or angry, keep doing those things that you already have a tie to. The repetition of the activities that make your body and mind feel GOOD will have a positive effect on the negative moods. Just keep doing them. Over, and over, and over. And remember; this too, shall pass.
If you enjoyed this post, make sure you subscribe to my RSS feed!
Partly Cloudy
Lara – hope your day continues to get better – nothing like a nice 7+ miles to start the process off on the right foot. To borrow a quote someone shared the other day, “I have never regretted running – only not running.”
To that I say, exactly right! It is amazing how doing something that you love can brighten an otherwise dreary sky. Take good care, Joe
So true, Lara! Some runs take us to that “special place.” If we could make them all like that, we would! But they all make us feel better than we would have if we had not run!
Nice post!
I tried commenting earlier, and it ate my comment!
Anyway… Did you write this post for me? I’ve been feeling REALLY REALLY down lately. It’s good to have the reminder to hold close to the things that really do give me comfort until I can figure out the reason behind the way I feel. Thank you.
Another insightful blog post. I agree: It’s important to engage in behaviors that make you feel good (like running), esp. when you’re down and don’t feel like it.
We often make the mistake of waiting to feel inspired/motivated before we act, but the inverse (reverse?) is actually true: When you act, you feel inspired. Cheers, S.
Just yesterday I read a piece online (wish I could remember where) about childhood traumas – how they aren’t ever as traumatic when you’re a child as they are when you resurrect them as an adult. An interesting take on childhood bad memories. I hope you are able to work through yours and turn some of those negative feelings into more optimistic ones.
This is what I need to remember, so I will put it into words. Engage in behaviors that make you feel GOOD. When things get hard, when you’re depressed, frustrated, stressed or angry, keep doing those things that you already have a tie to. The repetition of the activities that make your body and mind feel GOOD will have a positive effect on the negative moods. Just keep doing them. Over, and over, and over. And remember; this too, shall pass.
I needed to read this today. Thanks.
I’ve also been working on some business lately (who isn’t, I guess), and I can totally sympathize with everything in this post. My strategy: Just keep on doing things that feel healing, and try to be patient that the healing and understanding will happen. In the meantime, quit dissing yourself for the things you don’t do, and start celebrating the things you DO (7.5 miles is a lot in most people’s books!)!