Stop Moving So Fast

There are a million things floating around my head right now.  Project ideas, potential races, interesting classes, foreign languages, business endeavors… the list is long, and then continues with household chores, menu planning and snow shoveling.  How can I possibly do it all?

The short answer is:  I can’t.

There’s an initial surge of frustration at being thwarted by the constraint of time, and I feel a little like a child being told she can’t stay up until midnight playing/writing/reading.  There are so many things to do, how can I possibly let go and sleep?

After frustration, there’s an overwhelming sense of relief.  I CAN’T do everything.  I have to choose.  I have to narrow my focus and decide where I’m going to put my energy.  When I decide, then I can create a plan of action, and THEN I can implement.  Only then.  Maybe I won’t be doing everything that I am capable of, but I’ll be doing something that has value to me.  Therein lies the reward.

It takes time to create viable plans.  When you sit down to create a plan, all the other niggling thoughts about what you COULD do are pushed aside, and it becomes possible to focus on the task at hand.  The thoughts become manageable, the mind is focused, and there’s space to think.

I have 24 hours in my day, just like everyone else.  I have obligations that take up part of my time, just like everyone else.  To insert anything into my life, I’ll have to have a plan of action, otherwise I’m spiraling and my brain will literally explode.

Yesterday, I took my own advice and stopped moving so fast.  I spontaneously spent a few hours with one of my best friends, and then a few hours later, an impulse came knocking and resulted in a much-needed, enjoyable mid-afternoon run.  I only wore the Garmin so I’d know the time.  I didn’t worry about my pace or distance, or pushing myself into hard heart-rate zones or adding fartleks to the route.  I slowed the speed and enjoyed the run even more.

In the days of old, people moved slower.  There was more time to learn a skill, deepen a friendship, or immerse in a culture.  There were less “shoulds” in life, and more “because I want to’s”, mostly because we were less aware of what every other person in the world was doing.  Before Twitter, the nightly news, big football games and a million activities to experience, there was sitting at home, hanging with the family, and talking about what the kids were doing in school and whether Bobby should run track or go out for baseball.  He had to choose, you see, because he couldn’t do both.

In a time when people are ultra-aware of what everyone else is doing, we’ve create a culture where many people are insecure because they feel that they don’t measure up to the rest of the world.  Other people’s accomplishments look grandiose compared to ours.  The fallacy is that we all get to different places depending on a million different factors.  We’re not all on a super-highway, and not all roads lead to the same gas station.

Today, I’m slowing down.  I’m taking time to write my thoughts and make lists.  I know what I’ve done and how I got here.  Now, it’s time to formulate a plan to get myself to the next big challenge my life holds.