It occurred to me this morning that I could do a running streak until my divorce is final. It could be anywhere between 30 and 60 days I suppose… could I possibly run that many days? I’ve already put in four. Would it be a big deal to run every day until the thing is finalized? Could I mark time in a healthy way by staying present in the day, in the moment? What would it feel like to process emotion by looking forward to each new day as homage to movement and joy?
I think I’d like to try. I’ve always been wary of doing a streak for the sake of it, but this might feel good. I’ve run for four days in a row (as of today). I’m already sleeping better and strength is returning to my legs and core. I’m feeling more like ME than I’ve felt for a while, and that’s the best reason to do it.
Today’s trail run was completely different than the one last week. Last week I was a hurting unit. My hips ached, I could barely lift my feet over the rocks, and I dreaded each and every downhill. I couldn’t navigate the ascents and walked several of the descents. My feet didn’t remember how to find secure footing on the rocks and my quads weren’t engaging.
Today, my body behaved like a runner’s body. I’ve run six out of the past seven days, done two BRICKS in a row, and it’s showing. My legs have more strength and some of my agility has returned. My lungs did the ol’ in-and-out thing and I wasn’t exhausted after the long climbs into Eldorado Canyon. I never had the urge to stop. Motion felt so good… like coming home to a warm embrace.
The crickets were out in full force today. Without the chatter of women around me I heard every nuance, and suddenly their chirping was a symphony behind lyrics that were stuck on Repeat in my head:
But I will hold on hope
And I won’t let you choke
On the noose around your neck
And I’ll find strength in pain
And I will change my ways
I’ll know my name as it’s called again
The phrase “but I will hold on hope and I won’t let you choke on the noose around your neck” has been a mantra these last few months. I don’t know how or why, but I’m holding onto hope that life WILL be better on the other side of all this, and I’m going to be okay in the end.
To that end, I’m going to do a running streak. I’m going to run every day until my divorce is final. No one will have to ask how many days until it’s done… just ask me if I’m still running.